User blog comment:ChurchPants+ParoleBaby=LOVE!/iDate Sam & Freddie prediction/@comment-3996696-20110514203013

I think you were exaggerating when you said you were a "professional" writer. A professional writer would try to put emotion into their writing, like through paragraphs of how mixed up their feelings are and trying to make the characters think of what to do next. Not just something like: Billy: I... I love you. Sally: I love you too, but... I can't be with you!

It should be like: "I..." Billy hesitated, "I love you." Sally didn't know what to say. She knew her feelings for Billy were true. "I love you too," She finally admitted, "but... I can't be with you!" Sally's feelings were all jumbled up. What was more important? Her happiness or her father's trust?

Please, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I think this might help you a bit to become a real professional. thanks.