Thread:Alica123/@comment-2219055-20120412211705

Background info: Cole tells Blaine.

* * *

“Blaine?”

Blaine looked up from his locker and found Cole. “Hi. What’s up?”

“I need to talk to you about something. Do you have time?” Cole asked.

Blaine looked a little confused, but nodded all the same. “Sure.” He shut his locker. He followed Cole as he headed back to the choir room.

“I got him,” Cole said to Chris and Mia as they came inside.

Blaine looked confused at the sight of Mia and Chris. Last he remembered, Cole wasn’t speaking to either of them.

“What’s going on?” Blaine asked.

“I’ve been having a problem,” Cole said, “and they’ve been trying to help me. But they suggested I talk to you, because you might be the only person who knows what I’m going through.”

Blaine put his bag on the piano. “Okay.”

Cole rubbed the back of his neck and looked up at him. “I think I might be gay.”

Blaine raised his eyebrows. “Oh. Okay. What makes you think that?”

Cole took a deep breath. “I think I have feelings for Sebastian. I had a dream about him when were in Orlando,” he said slowly. He wondered how long it would be before he wouldn’t be embarrassed talking about it anymore. “And it won’t get out of my head. I can’t stop thinking about him. I feel like I can’t even look him in the eye.”

Blaine’s mouth fell open a little. “Wow.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Cole said to him. He sat down in one of the empty chairs.

“Well, first of all, based on what you just told me, I would say you definitely have feelings for Sebastian,” Blaine said.

“He’s kind of in denial, though,” Mia said. “That’s why he came to you. That song he just sang in glee club? He was lamenting about how he thinks this is some kind of curse.”

“Yeah, you can’t do that,” Blaine said to Cole. “That’s not healthy. If you keep pushing that away, you’re never going to be happy. You need to take some time and accept the fact that you’re gay.”

“Wait a minute,” Chris said. “Maybe you’re not gay.”

Cole looked at him, confused. “What?”

“Maybe you’re just bi. I mean, you’ve dated girls before.”

Cole raised his eyebrows slightly. Maybe Chris was right.

“Well,” Blaine said. “A person’s sexuality isn’t based on who they’re attracted to. It’s based on who they fall in love with. So, did you fall in love with any of the girls you dated at your old school?”

Cole thought back. He had dated four girls before transferring to McKinley. They were very brief relationships, though. Two months long, at most.

“I don’t think so,” Cole said slowly. “Those relationships didn’t last long enough. I mean, love takes time to build, doesn’t it?”

Blaine nodded.

“Well, what about me?” Mia asked.

Cole looked up at her. He seemed hesitant. Neither of them had talked about their relationship since they broke up.

“Come on. We’re broken up now, I’m not luring you into a trap. Just be honest. Did you love me?” Mia asked.

Cole thought back again. He thought she was cute and pretty, he enjoyed spending time with her, and she was his longest relationship, albeit theirs was just a few weeks longer than the rest of them. But maybe two and a half months still wasn’t long enough. Mia didn’t stir anything inside him that resembled love.

Cole slowly shook his head. “No. I didn’t.”

Blaine nodded again. “Okay, now try this. Think back to how you felt about Mia, and compare that to how you feel about Sebastian. What’s different?”

Cole shut his eyes as he pondered this. With Mia, he just liked her as a person. Yeah, she was pretty, talented, and a good kisser, but none of that stirred something inside him. He always felt perfectly calm with her. He felt calm around girls in general, they never made him nervous.

Sebastian, on the other hand, was off the charts at the moment. Before Nationals, Cole really enjoyed their friendship. He had never become this close friends with a guy before. He had childhood friends back in Cincinnati, but he had never become that close with them. After his dream, Cole started noticing things about Sebastian, like his green eyes, his smile, and how sometimes he wrapped his headphone wire around his fingers when he was listening to his iPod. He especially liked how he stood up to Jesse the day before Nationals. Every time Sebastian so much as brushed him accidentally, Cole felt tiny volts of electricity shoot up and down his arms.

“It’s stronger,” Cole finally said. “A lot stronger.”

Blaine nodded.

“But that’s what I hate about this,” Cole said. “He makes me nervous. I don’t get nervous about crushes. I just don’t.”

“No, you don’t get nervous about girls,” Mia corrected.

“I don’t think you really had a crush on those girls,” Blaine said. “I think you just liked the idea of having a girlfriend because that’s what you’ve always known. You didn’t know any other option.”

“I hate this feeling, though,” Cole said.

“It’s part of human nature to get nervous around a crush. We fear the unknown. When you’re around a crush, you get nervous, because you don’t know what could happen between you two. You can imagine it, but you don’t really know for sure.”

Cole stared at the floor. He knew he was going to have a hard time adjusting to this.

Blaine sat down next to Cole and put a hand on his shoulder. “All of this is completely normal. It happens. There is nothing wrong with it whatsoever. You just have to find a way to deal with it.”

Cole didn’t say anything. He continued to stare at the floor.

“You’re still you,” Blaine said. “You still look the same, dress the same, talk the same, and have the same interests as you did before. Just because you’re gay doesn’t mean you have to try and fit the stereotypes. You don’t have to care more about clothes or go to Lady Gaga concerts because of that.”

Cole looked at him. Blaine looked back at him encouragingly. Cole gave him a small smile.

“So, once you’ve accepted all this, would you want to be his boyfriend?” Blaine asked.

“Is that what it’s called?” Cole asked. “I thought it was ‘life partner’.”

“’Life partner’ is more serious. ‘Life partner’ is like when you could be married or engaged. But anyway, would you?”

Cole paused, thinking.

“I think you should talk to Sebastian,” Mia suggested.

“No, I disagree,” Blaine objected. “You need to become comfortable in your skin again. You need to adjust to this. My suggestion is to come out to the whole glee club. Just tell them you’re gay, don’t mention Sebastian at all, because then that puts him on the spot, too. Everyone will support you 100%. Then, when you’re more comfortable, come out to your parents, so that you can be as honest with them as you are with yourself. After that, I suggest telling Sebastian the truth.”

Cole nodded. “Then what?”

“Well, I can’t give you a how-to on dating guys, especially when you’ve dated girls before. I don’t know how different it is. You’re gonna have to figure that out on your own.” 