User blog:One Singular Sensation/Becky Season 1 Episode 4: Dr. Candy Doom

We see Becky outside the therapist's office.

"But I don't want to go in!" Becky whined.

"You have to talk about your kidnapping addiction to someone professional." Alica responded.

Becky sighed. "Alright." she walked in, leaving Alica in the hallway.

"Hello Becky. I am your therapist, Candy Doom."

Becky studied Candy up and down. She was a female in her early twenties, het she had a fake beard resembling Dumbledore's on her face. She sat crossed legged on her spinny chair.

"Take a seat, Rebecca," said Candy, adjusting her Harry Potter glasses with no glass inside, "We have a lot to talk about."

Becky sat on the seat labeled 'peasant holder', for it was the only other one in the room.

"Um yes, about my kidnapping-"

"Enough about that," said Candy, switching on the TV, "We will now discuss my feels."

"Your feels-"

"Yes, my feels."

On the TV, a girl in a leotard did a complex jump off a beam and landed right on her feet, and stuck.

"I HAVE LOST THE ABILITY TO CAN!" said Candy, falling over.

Reason was about to leave his house. He opened the door and Yoshi was on the other side, staring into his soul.

"Hi Reason!" said Yoshi loudly, his eyes open wide.

"Oh, hi Yoshi," said Reason rubbing his neck, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, I was wondering if we could hang out, since you don't have work today and Becky has an all day meeting with a therapist and Alica is there with her-"

"Wait wait wait," said Reason, cutting him off.

"BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO CUT ME OFFF" sang Yoshi.

"How did you know I don't have work today?"

"I stalk you."

Reason shook his head. "No, I can't hang out today. I'm busy."

"Doing what?"

"None of your business." and with that, Reason ran away.

Yoshi sat rubbing his chin for a second, and then went off to get a hot dog.

"Okay....So now that we're done talking about your...feels...." said Becky after a couple hours of rant and creys from her therapist, "Can we talk about my problems...."

Candy's back straightened. "Of course. So how long have you had the urge to kidnap people?"

"Since I was born,"

"How many people have you actually kidnapped?"

"I have lost count."

Candy Doom nodded.

"Um excuse me ma'am...." said Becky.

Dr. Candy Doom looked up.

"Coud you take off that fake beard and glasses? It's distracting me."

Candy narrowed her eyes into slits and ripped the articles off her face. "Patients always trying to tell me how to live my life. They don't know about my beard. They don't know about my feels. They don't know what I've been through."

Alica snuck onto Becky's tumblr account via her phone.

"Good, good" hissed Alica.

She changed the settings so now it wasn't password restricted.

So now you don't need a password for http://peopletokidnap.tumblr.com/. Ok.

"I'll tell you what," said Dr. Candy Doom, sliding off her seat, "It's fun to pretend you're Lauren Lopez."

"Excuse me...."

Candy log rolled to Becky's seat, "Of course you can be a muggle like yourself."

"I'm confused."

Candy army rolled to her shelf of books. "Muggle. You. No difference."

"I'm scared..."

Candy licked her foot. "You should be."

Yoshi ran out of his house and kissed Fudge on the street.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" screamed Fudge as she pushed him off her.

"I HAVE NEVER FOUND LOVE!" screamed Yoshi as he fell to a heap on the floor. I JUST WANTED TO KISS SOMEBODY, YOU KNOW!"

"KISS SOMEONE ELSE! SOMEONE YOUR AGE" Said fudge as she wiped her lips. "AND GOOD DAY TO YOU!"

"I think this will help you with your addiction." said Candy, giving Becky a pamphlet about obsessive kidnapping.

"I CAME HERE ALL DAY JUST FOR ONE STUPID PAMPHLET?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?" said Becky, angered.

"Yes."

"Why?!"

Candy looked down at her feet. "I don't get out alot, I just need someone to talk to sometimes....Like a therapist."

Becky left, furious.

Candy looked in the mirror. "Maybe I can be my own therapist." She waved. "Hello..."

"So how was your appointment?" Alica asked Becky as she walked out.

Becky glared in Alica's direction. "I don't want to talk about it."

Yoshi noticed Alica from afar, someone the same age as him.

Beckyyyyyy