User blog comment:Random Confessor/Anonymous Confessions/@comment-4654489-20111219100057

For a while, I feel like my friends don't give a damn. So long as I'm this hilarious person who makes them laugh, why should they care what I might be feeling. They just dump all of their problems on me assuming that I have none of my own. They talk about how they don't like people who do certain things, like go to specific shops, unaware that I do. They make fun of my music style because it's not THEIR music style. They say stuff about how they're "so not rich" and then go on to list everything they have while I have NOTHING. I don't live like they do. They can go to school not worrying about their parents... I go to school every day wondering if TODAY is the day my mother will fall ill again, or if TODAY is the day my dad will get electrocuted... again.

There's so much pressure to be perfect in my family. I love my sister as do the rest of my family, but we all know she will not achieve as much as me. I'm the smartest in my family, even now. Because of this, I'm scrutinized for every mistake I make. My grades are improving yet my parents are still not happy with me! "You're always on that computer" they tell me. Yes, to escape you people and to talk to others in a place where I have no worries.

My classmates talk about me behind my back. They're horrible. Luckily, some of them will be moving classes soon. I can't take them much longer. I can feel it when they stare at me. I feel my blood begin to boil and my heart bound. I know my fingers are curling into fists, I know I am about to punch them.

That brings me onto the fact I get TOO angry... I can't help myself. Once I start hitting someone... I just can't stop. My friends annoy me too much, they end up slammed against a locker. It's the reason why my classmates won't fight me. They will insult me, but they will not even attempt to fight me.

I wonder if I will ever be loved. It sounds stupid, I know... but I don't want to die alone. I don't want to have to never get married. I want someone to love me.

I feel myself getting too attached to certain people on here... I know they do not really care back, but I care for them all the same.

And after all that, I think you could probably guess who I am...